Tired. Where Did We Lose Our Energy?
Updated: Sep 15, 2019
I remember one good explanation by Caroline Myss about how generally every person should have enough energy for each day it is just where we spend it all...
She was explaining it a bit like that:
Imagine you have 100 coins to spend every day it is perfect about for you to be able to do everything you want and need to do that day, no more no less. Imagine those coins are your energy. And every day you have the exact amount of energy that you need to spend your day perfectly. We have it.
So why do we feel tired? Imagine that you have these energy coins and everything that you do and everything that you focus on cost something.
So our budget might look something like this:
20 - worrying about what will happen today, tomorrow, in the future ( what if there is another crisis coming up?)
5 - fixating on the fact that traffic is really slow and we won't able to get to work in time
17 - remember that time when we were in our school's theatre club and during our performance we have forgotten our words
3 - on putting our lunchbox together and beating ourselves up about the fact that we didn't buy that discounted broccoli yesterday
24 - thinking about all the hurts that other people caused us and how we cannot forgive them and if only back then things would have turned out differently
20 - how we are STILL not where we are supposed to be (better job, more money, better health, happier relationship, more significant role in society…) aka the head monologue
11 - on things that we ACTUALLY need to do today
AND there we have 100 spent.
(OK, I know that it is maybe a bit of exaggeration, but I hope to put my point across)
So how do we live? So how do we get by? How do we survive day by day? I think that we do that by borrowing energy and we do that everyday.
So now we are in debt…Terribly in debt. We needed to survive somehow, so we borrowed energy from the places where we will need to pay back to and we borrowed our energy to be able to do things that we had to do to survive and sometimes we might have not even liked or wanted to do those things, because they don't actually give us anything back (i.e. energy draining job, keeping up appearances just to keep our social image).
Where did we borrow our energy from? From our future (aka "things are going to be different", "one day I am going to quit my job", "one day I will go traveling around the world"), from coffee (aka "I just need this extra boost to make myself do this thing today" - and then tomorrow, the day after tomorrow), from our sense of duty (I mean the negative one, where we feel we HAVE TO, aka "I have to stay in this town, even though nothing in here makes me happy and I feel like I am dead inside, but I need to stay here because I was born here and what if my parents need me one day") and from "what people are going to say about me if I won't shave my legs"? -> aka fear.
So yeeeaaas, we did survive, which is supposed to be a good thing…I guess. But how do we feel surviving like that? Do we really feel that we LIVE or just get by?
Probably it doesn't feel that great. At least - it doesn't feel that great to me. But since we have fallen in this pattern, what do we do now? That's the only way we know how to live. What do we do NOW?
I say we need to start to appreciate the value of our energy more. I think we need to start seeing clearly where we spend it. We need to know, what has happened to it.
Of course, sometimes we cannot help but think about the past or what will happen and it is a humane thing to do. Also, it could be that we have slipped into this mode at some point when times were though and because that's how we have managed, now that has become our habit. BUT my call here is about becoming AWARE where we spend our energy and once we notice that we do spend our energy on something that we 1) cannot control or 2) no matter how much energy we will spend won't change that thing that we are trying to change - we need to stop doing it, and start focusing it on those things that are truly important to us. We need to re-direct our energy on those things that are investments in our well being, or satisfaction, or future. We need to re-focus ON those things and people who really do matter to us, ON those causes that we truly believe in, ON that change that we really want to see.
So after we count our coins, we check our spending, we see where the common traits are, we can start our CONSCIOUS ENERGY BUDGETING. If we know that we spend too much on that thing that have happen in the past for example, we can choose stop doing that and if we cannot, at least we can look into reasons WHY we cannot stop spending our energy on that. Perhaps there is something unresolved, perhaps a part of us is stuck in there. Before we become aware of that, we cannot do anything about it. So once we know, we can at least choose or see what is preventing us from making the choice that we want to make. And then, choose again.
To summarise the point that I wanted to make, I will go with this: budgeting our money and finances is something that we do (hopefully) and we think it is a good thing to do if we were stay on top of it. So why shouldn't we do it with our energy? The energy that we live on is in truth the life force, which is much more important than money would ever be. Without it - we are dead. So then, WHY shouldn't we be taking care of our energy at least as much as we are looking after our finances?